Gotcha! Running list of April Fool's Day Internet Pranks

The best April Fool's Day prank so far in my lifetime was my senior year of high school when the Boston area got hit with three feet of snow.

The internet geeks are coming close this year, so I thought I'd start a running list of all the gems I've encountered so far today, I've been up for 3 hours now and have already had several laughs.
Google's CADIE: the world's first Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity; enables Autopilot to scan every one of your incoming messages and automatically send the perfect reply.

Guardian (UK): After 88 years, the Guardian will only be available via Twitter; experts say any story can be told in 140 characters.

YouTube: Self-explanatory, but they've flipped.

Reddit + Digg = Reddigg

Slideshare is falsely increasing their stats. And some people are buying it (ha!).

Well, I've got to get to work. If you've got any better ones, post them here. Or follow the running Tweets.

UPDATE 1 (9:05 a.m. ET): Sounds like the Conficker virus is a fake!

UPDATE 2 (9:15 a.m. ET): Rent out the Lincoln Bedroom in The White House for just $49 (bailout special).

I'm ok with freebies

Wow. I was tweeted this great white paper @Mequoda written by Michael A. Stelzner, and had to share what I learned. It’s FREE, and there much more to this than what I have covered below. As I am currently developing a social media strategy (I know, strategies are bad) I will take all the free knowledge I can get. I even delayed eating my lunch so I could read the whole thing:

My personal takeaways:

· Twitter, blogs, LinkedIn and Facebook were the top four social media tools used by marketers, in that order.

· Twitter is used by 94% of marketers who have been using social media for years, followed closely by blogs.

· 81% of all marketers named the number 1 advantage of social media marketing is generating exposure for the business

· People aged 30 to 39 are most likely to be using social media marketing

· Nearly all marketers spending 6+ hours a week on social media marketing found exceptionally positive results.

· Overall marketing costs dropped when social media marketing was implemented.
Share this—if you found this report valuable, pass it along. Download the report here.

Did I mention I’m on Twitter? @saltzberg

Why do you do what you do?

We brush our teeth because it we know prevents gum disease, tooth decay, and keeps our breath smelling fresh. We go to school to learn stuff, which leads to getting a job, and the ability to buy things. And then someday, we can afford to take vacations and relax, spend the money we’ve made and forget about brushing our teeth for a day or two (gross, jk, don’t do it).

I was thinking today about why we do the things we do. What I’ve said above isn’t rocket science or particularly insightful, but it shows the thought process behind an action or an inaction. That being said, can you back up everything you do with a reason?

In thinking about the “why” factor, how do you know when a communications strategy is working? What makes it a success? Well, that all depends on what your stated goals and objectives were before the project began. Was it to strengthen relationships, increase SEO, secure speaking engagements, drive Web site traffic, etc.? And even if you know your objectives, how do you know it’s time to adjust your expectations or definitions of success?

I often see blogs, wikis, Facebook groups etc. that have turned into ghost towns and wonder “what happened?” This is especially true on Twitter. People create accounts, tweet once, and go into hiding or something. I just want to ask “where did you go?!”

We often see people refer to their own personal social media successes for “duh!” reasons I won’t get into. But I’m interested in some real social media failures. Social media can be scary, so I know they’re out there. Own up; it’s ok to go there.

Library of Congress's Flickr Expose

I am addicted to the LOC's new Web. 2.0 initiative! Their archives have amazing human interest and historical photos of American life. It's a remarkable collection that everyone should browse through when you have a moment.

Two little girls in a park near Union Station, Washington, D.C. (LOC)
Originally uploaded by The Library of Congress

The photostream can be seen here on Flickr.

Their collections are really a testament to all of the things Web 2.0 stands behind: sharing, collaboration and creativity.

I've "fave"d a few of the LOC's images already, and I am certain I will be doing some more in the future. They are encouraging comments and tagging in order to gain a more comprehensive understanding of the photos in their archives. Fabulous!

2 is Better than 1 Kraft Single (Double?)

Kraft Introduces New Kraft Doubles For Couples

NORTHFIELD,IL—Kraft officials claim that this is the first adjoined-cheese product that's both practical and sexy. Kraft Doubles — jointly wrapped slices of American cheese specially designed with couples in mind.

Ok, Kraft. Just say what really happened here. You want to save money on plastic and save the environment. You recently laid off half of your plastic wrapper inspector workforce. You want to compete with the traditional heart-shaped box of candy come February 14, but are finding it difficult since processed cheese is a hard sell to romantics.

But please, don't try to convince me you had couples in mind when launching this ridiculous product. In fact, according to you (Kraft!), only 8 percent of your regular consumers have spouses.

And I don't believe anyone will gain a spouse by using Kraft.

Now, not only will you have to peel the sticky, orange mass away from it's protective cellophane sheath — you'll have to pull the slices away from each other. YUCK!

This Just in — Failure is A-Okay

Failure Now An Option

WASHINGTON —A recent poll revealed that 64% of Americans are comfortable with coming up short, while 43% are content to try only once rather than try, try again.

Stop trying! Everyone else has.

Snow Pricklies

I got out of work early today so here's a photo I took with the extra time. It ended up snowing and sleeting several inches — and here is what resulted outside. I thought this looked strangely like a leaf. It's the underside of a tree branch taken from my balcony.



Maybe I'll be off tomorrow and really be able to take some good ones.

Balls to the Walls